I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
