i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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