dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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