For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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