Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
