how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
