I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize