How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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