C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
