i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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