butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just saw a hot homeless man
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
