Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
