well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize