You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
