Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
