I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
