Christians are straight up FREAKS
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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