See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
