We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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