I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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