we have pet lesbian snakes
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize