: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
