He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It was like getting head from an anaconda
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
