I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
We named our party play list daddy issues
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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