Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
