Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
