Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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