Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
