We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize