I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
