fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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