Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
