you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
