So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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