Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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