Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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