Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
