Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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