I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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