And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
