I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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