I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Randomize
