stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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