i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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