my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
