I CAN MOONWALK!
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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