I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
