Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
