I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
