I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
