i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
