Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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