but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
